I have always wonderd about the nature of suicide bombers. you know, where do the terrorist organizations find these people? Do they have operatives working for suicide help-lines or something? ” Hallo. I hate the world. I am so alone. I feel depressed and i wanna kill myself!” “Uh-huh. That’s fantastic! Can you drive stick?”

But seriously,I always wonderd, how do they do it? I mean, i understand that the religious appeal of martyrdom is cool and all, and i did notice how none of the suicidebombers is ever over the age of 25 (cause it’s easier to influence and brainwash them when they are young), but at some point they must hit a snag period. At some point the supply must not keep up with the demand. How do they overcome that problem at times when people who are ready to die for the cause are lacking? How do you then keep up the appearance that your cause is so just that you always can find people willing to die for it?

Well, now i know. Now i finally figured it out.

One way to do it is to use handicapped or retarded people to carry out the bombing for ya!

Want more proof? There ya go:

Insurgents used a handicapped child as one of their suicide bombers on election day, Iraq’s interior minister said today.Falah al-Naqib said 38 attacks were carried out on polling stations in Iraq on Sunday and that one of the suicide bombings was carried out by a disabled child.

“A handicapped child was used to carry out a suicide attack on a polling site,” al-Naqib said in Baghdad. “This is an indication of what horrific actions they are carrying out.”He gave no other details about the attack, but police at the scene of one the Baghdad blasts said the bomber appeared to have Down’s Syndrome.

And then there is always tricking your own people and making it look like a suicide bombing when it isn’t!

He wasn’t supposed to live, and the way he tells the story today, this “suicide bomber” wasn’t quite ready to die. Twenty-one-year-old Ahmed Abdullah al-Shayea had come to Iraq from Saudi Arabia to join the infamous terrorist known as Abu Mussab al-Zarqawi in a holy war against the American infidels. On Christmas morning, 2004, he got his first assignment, to park a tanker truck full of explosives near the high walls around the Jordanian Embassy in Baghdad. He didn’t know that four fellow terrorists in a Jeep Cherokee following a safe distance behind held the remote-control trigger. When they pushed it, an explosion thundered across the city, killing 10 Iraqi policemen. But al-Shayea, unlike scores of other bombers who’ve been vaporized beyond recognition, was blown through the windshield and, against all odds, survived.

Something tells me the “insurgants” are losing this battle.

Shouldn’t be long now!

Some people see things that are and ask, Why? Some people dream of things that never were and ask, Why not? Some people have to go to work and don’t have time for all that crap.

Today i can’t blog as much as i usually would, nor will i be able to provide the long boring rants that you have come to expect from me because I actually have work to do today, and i am far too lazy to try to juggle both at the moment. So, to make it up to you in a way, i will provide you all with a bunch of interesting articles and links that i found amusing and interesting and hope you would let it slide just this time.

Ok, here we go:

Andrew Sullivan, the gay, HIV-positive, catholic, libertarian, I-supported-Bush-and-the-war-but-voted-for-Kerry-anyway writer and blogger has just announced that he is retiring from the Blogsphere. Good-bye Sully, it was fun while it lasted.

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The Insurgants have captured a G.I.JOE…ehh…doll. Those evil Iraqis. Might Have to send him for the rescue operation. (Tip from Kender & Kat)

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Leroy Wells, who stunned every American Idol viewer by his sheer talent of being “crunk” while not saying one coherent sentence during his performance, got to watch himself on TV from jail. He apparently got arrested for shooting a man in the hip. His Family’s excuse for his behavior? He was a “pretty boy” who “got picked on a lot”. Watch the video and inform me how much of a “pretty boy” you find this guy!

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Got a question? They have the answer!

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Continuing our gay theme today, here is an interesting tidbit :Apparently being Gay isn’t a choice, but rather caused by genetics. Hmmm!(Tip from Libertarian Girl)

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The Duo who made the VW commercial that i mentioned here have officially apologized and V.W. agreed to drop the suit. Given that this commercial was the coolest commerical V.W. had in a long ass time, my thoughts on the subject are best conveyed by what Southpark’s Cartman would usually say in such a situation : LAME!

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Jennifer Aniston is an evil bitch. First she wouldn’t give Brad his perfect babies, because she wants a career. Then she wouldn’t let him just have phone sex with Angelina Jolie, like good friends do, causing him to break up with her. Now, she is kicking Ali G and his fiance to the curb, causing them to be homeless. Is there no limit to her evilness? Someone has to stop that woman, cause she is going too far.

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The return of the Chalabi and Miller Show. What that woman said on Hardball is underhanded slander towrads Bush and the current adminstration if wrong and really disturbing if true.

That’s it for now. Have a lovely day!

The very existence of flame-throwers proves that some time, somewhere, someone said to themselves, You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.

The always excellent Christopher Hitchens has a great article on why those people who call Iraq “the next vietnam” have no idea what they are talking about. Here is a moneyshot :

American generals and policymakers could never agree as to whether the guerrillas in Vietnam were self-supporting or were sustained from the outside (namely the northern half of their own country). However one may now view that debate, it was certainly true that Hanoi, and the southern rebels, were regularly resupplied not by minor regional potentates but by serious superpowers such as the Warsaw Pact and China, and were able to challenge American forces in battlefield order. The Iraqi “insurgents” are based among a minority of a minority, and are localized geographically, and have no steady source of external supply. Here the better comparison would be with the dogmatic Communists in Malaya in the 1940s, organized principally among the Chinese minority and eventually defeated even by an exhausted postwar British empire. But even the die-hard Malayan Stalinists had a concept of “people’s war” and a brave record in fighting Japanese imperialism. The Iraqi “insurgents” are dismal riff-raff by comparison.

Go read it!

Ohh, and the next time some anti-war leftie tells you that this is the next vietnam tell them to go read a book, after delivering a swift kick to their asses of course !

It’s for their own good. Trust me on this!

Previously i have mentioned here the fact that Hillary Clinton has been talking a lot about religion and faith and abortion lately while singing a different tune then what we have heard from her for years. Her tone now has more of a conservative slant to it and it’s just so happens that she started talking like this now , right after JFK2 got his ass handed to him last November. Always giving Hillary a helping hand, NYT wrote this fluff piece to inform us that Hillary isn’t the power-hungry-will-do-anything-to-be-president hellspawn we know her to be, but actually a religious praying saint of a lady:

In a recent series of public appearances, Mrs. Clinton has generated considerable attention - and, in some cases, scorn - by imbuing her remarks with mentions of God, faith, prayer and the need to be more tolerant of people who are opposed to abortion and gay marriage because of their beliefs.

“The same way I tolerate my husband getting his winky wet by younger women”, Hillary said. “I don’t like it one bit, but if i am gonna be president, i am gonna have to suck it up! Wait, is this mic on?”

Naturally, because not everyone is stupid, moronic and naive, some people are able to smell that this is bullshit a mile away. (smell bullshit a mile away? is that a mixed metaphor?)

In a recent interview, Michael Long, the head of New York State’s Conservative Party, called her a “political secularist” who was merely making an appeal to religious traditionalists in preparation for a presidential campaign.

“All of a sudden she is saying she has these deep convictions,” he said. “I don’t believe that. It’s clear to me that she is getting ready to launch her candidacy for presidency, and she will become whatever she has to become to appeal to centrist voters.”

Some people might say that this dude is biased because he is a *conservative*. Fair enough, how about a democratic strategist. Does that work for ya mr/mrs Hillary 08?

“It seemed like a sign that she is taking steps to position herself for a presidential run in 2008,” said one Democratic strategist. “Otherwise, there was no reason for her to talk about this, especially in a heavily pro-choice state like New York.”

Don’t really need to comment on that now do i? Clear as a stripper’s heels!

Finally, one last word from Saint Hillary:

“But I also say that had I not been a praying person that after I’d been in the White House for a few months, I would have become a praying person.”

You see, that’s kinda funny, cause from what i hear having you in the white house for a few months had that same effect on millions of americans.

Hell, if you win, I know i am gonna start praying more often, cause i have a feeling we are gonna need all the help we can get.