The Mubarak drinking game

Yesterday was Mubarak’s speech at the NDP conference, which was supposed to show surprises and shed some light on the proposed 2007 constitutional changes we keep hearing rumors about ( the one about removing judicial oversight over elections is terrifying). Given that me and Hossam were supposed to hang out even though he had to transcribe the speech for his work, we decided that we could do both by playing a Mubarak speech drinking game. The rules were simple: You drink whiskey and you take a sip everytime Mubarak says one of the following 3 words: Democracy, Reform or Future.

Holy shit did we get drunk.

Here is the tally (I kept count):

Reform was said 18 times.

Future was said 7 times.

Democracy or democratic was said twice. 2 times. That’s it.

There was  one word, however, that kept popping about 40 times, and that word was “constitutional”. And even though it was self evident we should’ve included it to our drinking game, I kind of thank god we didn’t: We were drinking whiskey, people!

That aside, I found it interesting that the word constitution had totally replaced the word democracy in the NDP vocabulary. Every other sentence had the word constitutional in it. Oh well, I guess that’s the “new direction”. We are, after all, a democracy now, No?

There was also a “no talk about the war on terror should be held without examening its causes” speech, which seemed to imply that the key to stop terrorism was the middle-east peace process (cause that’s the cause and not the recruitment tool, get it?), which we know is Mubarak’s little niche. The Message he sent the americans was clear: You can’t win without peace in the ME, and I am the peace guy, so you better take off the heat off of me and mind your own business.  Get that you imperialist pigs?

Last but not least, more as an added bonus really, there was one word that got utterd 3 times during that speech. The N word. Nuclear.

Yep, Mubarak has just announced that Egypt’s new energy priority would be seeking Nuclear energy. Cause you see, it’s our right to have it, just like Iran.

Nevermind that taking care of the railroad is kicking our ass, we cand handle Uranium enrichment. And shit, if we end up having a chernobel-like accident that kills thousands and left millions sterile, look at the bright side: Population Control! Wink

Welcome to a nuclear middle-east everyone.