January 2007 archive

Jermain wants Jackson to become muslim

NONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONONO. NO! HELL NO. Please dear god NO! We don't need anymore freaks!

Hey, MJ, why not scientology? Scientology is nice. It has space aliens and shit. You like that, don't you Moonwalker? So stay away from Islam, which has no aliens and promises you lots of women (Double "Ewwwww" for you I am sure), and move towards Scientology, where I am sure Tom Cruise and John Travolta will take you into their bosoms immedietly. Oh god, mental image. Why do I do that to myself? 

Bloggers are unpatriotic reputation tarnishers

Just a heads up y'all:

Egypt's interior
minister on Friday accused those reporting cases of alleged police
torture of being part of an 'unpatriotic campaign' to tarnish the
country's police forces.

Habib Al Adly warned Egyptians against using the internet to jeopardise national security.

Information posted on
the internet that poses a hazard to the government "is a very dangerous
crime – a crime of which its victims include individuals, the state and
its institutions", Habib Al Adly told state-run Egyptian television
during a more than one-hour long interview.

Hmm, so I guess I shouldn't link you guys to this now, huh?

Wankers! 

The Media anti-Shia campaign continues

Remember Ihab al Sharief, the egyptian diplomat that got kidnapped and killed in Iraq ? Well, the egyptian state-owned newspaper Al Ahram came out yesterday with a tiny blip that says that Iranian Intelligence agents are the ones behind his kidnapping and Murder, in an effort to limit Egypt's influence in Iraq. The report cites high diplomatic sources that wish to stay anonymous.

The blip also explains one more thing, and I am translating here:

" The high egyptian diplomatic sources have also declared that there are reasons for the question-raising egyptian/jordanian/ gulf support for the new american plan in Iraq, explaining that the egyptian support for the plan isn't baseless, but as an attempt to save fellow muslim brothers who are being ethnically cleansed, especially in Baghdad, on the hand of armed groups whose allegiance is known."

Nice, ehh?

So, if the armed groups aren't american, and the story talks about how the Iranians are killing egyptians, one concludes two things from this paragraph:

1) Shiites are not fellow Muslim Brothers. 

2) The Egyptian/Jordanian/Gulf support to the american plan is totally based on secterian reasons.

I know, I know, what's the news here? Ehh, nuttin new really. But it's good to hear the egyptian government declare it and make it official is all. Iran killed our envoy, the shia are not our Muslim brothers, and the Sunnis are getting ethnically cleansed by militant groups in Iraq that have knwon allegiances (hint, hint, nudge nudge).

My fellow egyptians, you will so be psychologicaly prepped for a war with Iran by the end of this year, it's not even funny. 

24, reviewed

After watching 5 back to back episodes of 24, here are my thoughts:

1) The people who make this show can not tell arabs and indians apart!

2) Is it just me, or is Assad the coolest terrorist ever? He is like the arab Bauer! Give Assad his own show.

3) The villian, Fahad, should be named "Bin Diesel" from now on! (coined by Sarah K )

4) Nuclear explosions are not a problem, it seems. You can have one in your city and it's all good!

5) Bauer can still kill you and everybody you know, even if he was all broken and tortured in chinese prison for 20 months.

6) Stabbing Bauer doesn't stop him or weaken him, or even make him bleed for long. He has wolverine-like healing powers, and this shit just makes him angry. And you don't want Bauer angry. I mean, he killed a man in the first episodes by biting a chunk of his neck out. Wanna mess with that guy?

7) Kal Pen gets the worst terrorist ever portrayed on TV award. His reason for turning on his american friend? He can't pronounce his name right "It's AKKKKHHHHMEDDDDDDDDD"! Boooo!

8) The new Black President is way too eager to give terrorists what they want! He is a pussy. Me hates him. And his sister is annoying! Where is his wife btw? What? A single AND black President? Yeah, cause that's plausible!

9) Why do people always question Jack Bauer? Just do what he tells you to do. He is always right!

10) Keifer Sutherland has the coolest voice for the job. I want that voice. No one would ever mess with me with that voice!

Ohh, and is it just me, or is this show a little too torture friendly? 

All in all, I am not sure you could call this show racist against arabs or bigoted against muslims, because for every bad arab or muslim they show (Bin Diesel, AKHMED) they have a good one (the head of the IAA and Nadia). I think they do the whole PC dance very well, and sooner or later the main villians will stop being muslims and will become russian or chinese or both. Oh, and the CTU and the White House will have like 30 traitors each. That's what always happens. It's a 24 tradition! So don't fret over the muslim/arab thing, Bauer will be torturing chinese or russian ass in no time!

That is all. 

Hezbollah's Founder lashes out at Hezbollah

Sheikh Subhi Tufaili, the Founder of Hezbollah and its first Secretary General, just lashed out at Hezbollah:

Hizbullah founder and ex leader Sheikh
Subhi Tufaili on Saturday accused Iran of stirring trouble between
Shiites and Sunnis to destroy both Iraq and Lebanon, urging Shiites to
mend fences with the majority Sunni sect.
Tufaili at a news conference said Shiites
are "small minorities scattered in the vast sea of the Islamic world.
It is in their interest to be allies for the majority and to mend
fences with Sunnis."

"Otherwise, we will destroy even our future… this is crazy…we'll be slaughtered like sheep even in Lebanon. This is a reality."

He said Iran's spiritual leader Ali
Khamenei has a dual policy. "In Iraq, he destroys Iraq under the slogan
of alliance with America and in Lebanon he destroys Lebanon under the
slogan that says the Sunnis are the allies of America."

He stressed Hizbullah leader Sayyed Hassan Nasrallah is the person who carries out Khamenei's policy.

I am an ex-secretary general for Hizbullah
and I know that Sayyed Hassan is in charge of carrying Sayyed
Khamenei's policy in Lebanon. Sayyed Abdul Aziz al Hakim is the person
who executes Khamenei's policy in Iraq."

He accused Hizbullah, of which he was fired
more than eight years ago after disagreeing with the Iranian
leadership, of forming its own state in Lebanon and "the resistance is
its weapon."

"There cannot be two states and two
weapons, that of Hizbullah and that of the government. We need to unify
the weapons under one command. Two states would lead to war," he said.

Hopefully someone will listen… 

How to win popularity in the Muslim world?

You get a picture taken of you while napping in a Mosque!

 

Piousness, defined! (Hattip Kamangir

Of course, you might look like a hobo, and some smart people might ask why you would need to sleep there when you are the freakin President, but who said Propaganda was for the smart amongst us? 

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