Just to make things clear, when I wrote that previous post, I was doing nothing but venting my frustration. Next thing you know, I have like numerous ideas, suggestions and offers- ranging from the absured, funny, creepy to the incredibly generous- from the world over. I would like to thank you all for them. I had no idea how many options I have. It's good to have options. Makes one feel better.
So yeah, Thank you very much, especially to those who sent me e-mails. I am definately replying to y'all today!
Enough of their claptrap! The place you want to be is Tuchuckalonia, a small but delightful coutry where the women are beautiful, the men are manly, and the children are all well-groomed and soft spoken. Our national bird is the Armadillo, our primary industries are bread baking and beer drinking, and we are a heavily armed population of devout pacifists.
What? So we’re not getting married next week so you can get your greencard and I can piss off my Southern Baptist family? Damn…and I just ordered a new outfit for the wedding night.
Ever considered Elbonia? I hear their mud is the best!
RocketRay,
You brought a smile to my face. But Calvin and Hobbes was still better.
You might consider applying for a job with a “think tank” in D.C. There is probably even a “think tank” that focuses on “think tanks” at this point.
Also, if you go the fake marriage route ask for real marriage gifts. If you ask for shit like an X-box everyone will know the marriage is fake and resent you for trying to score a free X-box.
RocketRay,
I am very much a fan of Elbonian Baywatch.