The Boy is back

I am finally back from Turkey. So much to report, so little time.

I have to say that my feelings towards Turkey are mixed at best: I really like the country, the food, the city of Istanbul and the ambience of it all, but I am having serious issues with a big part of the turkish population that I had to deal with. When I arrived, 2 seperate attempts to con me took place before I even got out of the airport, and then I spent a day escaping from the 58400572065879 pimps that surrounded my Hotel, who all spoke arabic. I felt like yelling and screaming" No, I don;t want Turkish girls, I don;t want hot russian girls, and my name is not Hajji". I ended up needing to take a girl with me everytime I walked out of the hotel because they wouldn't approach or harrass me if I had a girl with me. Imagine the ironic fruedian mindfuck of it all.

Also, amongst the things that did occur: an attempt by a friend to purchase hash for himself that turned horribly wrongand placed him and me in the clutches of turkish gangsters, which I managed to get out of with my money and ass intact; a weird foriegn lady living in the room next to me, who grabbed my ass and forced me to chnage rooms and floors; a number of cafes without menus specifically to cheat you out of money when the check comes, and a car accident on the way to the airport between our taxi and a truck which bruised my back and fucked up a friend's leg. And if that wasn;t enough, the secularists the day before I arrived did a huge demonstration to protest Adrogan's-turkey's islamist Prime Minister- presidential ambitions. The Islamists, sensing the secularists' fear, responded in the way expected from them, and slaughterd 3 turkish christians. To say things were tense in Turkey, well, that would've been an understatment!

But the food was good, the apple tea was good, the turkish coffee with pistachios were good, taking a cruise all along the Bosphorous was good, The haja Sophia and Sultan Ahmed were awesome. So all in all it was an ok trip!

Anyway, back to 270 unreplied e-mails, and this blog and a house that needs cleaning, and shitloads of laundry. Hmmph. Good thing I bought a lot of Alcohol Bottles coming in. Yay for Bacardi Reservoir Superior 8 anos rum. Hmmm….. 

17 Comments on The Boy is back

  1. kinzi
    April 23, 2007 at 12:43 pm

    Wow, SM, nothing like a change of scenery to make Cairo look great! And tales to regale us with, yabayay. Hamdililah assalaameh.

    Why, though, go with a guy to buy hash in Istanbul? Just doesn’t sound like a wise thing to do, unless you were thinking of future blogability. :)

    Reply
  2. Nomad
    April 23, 2007 at 1:44 pm

    “voir Istanbul et mourir”, or “voir Napoli et mourir”, that’s what one of our common-sayings

    Reply
  3. Kyle
    April 23, 2007 at 2:59 pm

    Wait a minute… you didn’t end up with a Russian hooker?
    Oh Sandmonkey, for shame.

    Reply
  4. Egypeter
    April 23, 2007 at 3:53 pm

    Wow, it sounds like your Turkish experience was quite different than mine. I was there for two weeks in ’05 and experienced none of the harassment that you did. Not once were me and my buddy ever bothered by Turkish gangs or con-artists and we visited several other cities besides Istanbul (Bodrum, Oludunez, Ephesus, Izmir)

    My only concern is that Turkey falls under the control of the Islamists/Nationalists. It seems like many in Turkey can’t let go of their awful Ottoman-era tendencies…

    Reply
  5. Lutoklawski
    April 23, 2007 at 4:12 pm

    Nah, Turkey is not going to fall under the control of Islamists, that´s for sure.
    The army will coup the scene long before.

    This is the way I deal with incidents like yours in Istanbul: I always remember that, eventually, it will be a good story!

    Oh, and I´m going to Turkey next fall. Can´t wait!

    Reply
  6. Valerie
    April 23, 2007 at 4:47 pm

    I’m looking forward to the stories. And remember, you shouldn’t let the facts get in the way of a good story.

    Reply
  7. Mark Krauss
    April 23, 2007 at 5:24 pm

    Humm, pushy pimps, dangerous dope dealers, overpriced cafe’s and crazy Arab cab drivers? bet you thought you were in New York, huh?

    Reply
  8. OregonGuy
    April 23, 2007 at 7:06 pm

    I was made aware of the “legal” ripoffs to unthinking tourists at restaurants in Budapest.

    Always look at the menu, always make sure the price shown is the price written down.

    Best of all, get a local to take you out. You can completely avoid the whole B.S.

    Never forget, in a foreign country restaurants often have two menus. Or more. Look before you leap.

    Reply
  9. brooklynjon
    April 23, 2007 at 8:08 pm

    Mark Krauss,

    Fool! New York’s cabbies are mostly Pakistani!

    Reply
  10. Vic
    April 24, 2007 at 12:34 am

    Welcome back SM! We missed you.
    What hotel did you stay in, in Istambyl? I was at the Otacoy Princess. (No internet either)

    What a trip you had. How ’bout more storied?

    Good luck with the laundry!

    //Vic

    Reply
  11. Waleed
    April 25, 2007 at 11:07 am

    three Christian Turks got killed by Islamists??

    wow!!…seems like a headliner

    got a source or is it just another product of your fertile secular imagination?

    Reply
  12. Canadienne Errante
    April 25, 2007 at 10:47 pm

    Wow! So, what do you think? A slice of European life? Is Turkey ready to join the European Union?

    Reply
  13. Jon
    April 28, 2007 at 10:24 pm

    We visited Istanbul and got rather decidedly luckier. Some of it was probably because we were staying well into a touristish region, some probably that my wife and I went together and had friends there.

    I lost my wallet, but it was to a pair of shorts with a miserable excuse for a back pocket rather than a thief (!).

    The politics were tense, though, because it when when Israel was invading Lebanon incompetently, and, at the same time, the Turkish govt was putting pressure on the US to let them chase the PKK.

    Reply

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