How do you raise your sagging popularity after 6 months of economic sanctions, limiting freedom of press and assembly , and opening fire on your own people during a national leader memorial service? You create a Boy Band. A Hamas Boy Band.
The asst. general manager of the palestinian police forces decided to create a vocalist group comprised of 5 members (5. Just like New Kids on the block, Backstreet Boys and Nsync. Ahh, Justin is so dreamy) of his security forces called "The protectors of the Homeland". They are all in their twenties, and they all have beards and they supposedly come from musical backgrounds, each allegdly having at least 6 years of musical experience gatherd in the free time between beheadings and bombings.
Their songs are not of the typical boyband I-wanna-love-you-on-a-mountain-you-are-the-virgin-for-me variety, as one- or at least me- would expect. They are supposidly songs about heroic fighters, resistance and islamic values, and are aimed to raise the spirits of the Gaza residents, who are depressed these days. Yes, I am sure all the people will need to ignore the depression of having a theocracy that opens fire on protests is a bunch of islamic Jihad pop songs. Good thinking. But I digress. The Gazan Hijabi tween market remains untapped. Someone call Lou Perleman, quick.