No christians please part 2

The discussion over the Sabaya cafe's decision to ban christian girls from entering it has reminded me of something that I've long forgotten: the reason why they don't allow christians in, is because Islam views non-Christian women the same as strange men. Hell, according to this Fatwa, it's not just christian women who good muslim veiled girls shouldn't be exposed to: 

If she is in the presence of trustworthy
Muslim women, her nakedness is only between her navel and knees. As for
what is above that, such as her chest, it is permissible for her to
uncover it in front of them, as often happens with nursing women. As
for if she is in the presence of:

  1. a non-Muslim woman, or
  2. a Muslim woman who is wicked through extramarital sexual intercourse (Ar. zina), or
  3. a Muslim woman who is wicked through lesbianism,

then it is not permissible for her to expose any of her body except
that which shows during work, this being: her head, neck, arms up to
the upper arms, and legs up to the knees (Tuhfa, 7.194,200). However,
it is better for her to cover herself [m: more than what is strictly
required] because a non-Muslim or wicked woman might describe her to a
man who is not permitted to look at her.

Ahh, see, there is LOGIC to it after all. If the good muslim chickas allow christian girls to see them uncoverd, the evil ungodly christians can go and tell men how the muslims girls really look like under the veil, and that could lead to…ehh..them imaging how the girls may look like under the veil. And that's just wrong. Very very bad.

Joking aside, this does have some serious conequences to me on the personal level, and for the entire country as well. The personal consequences to me has to do with my plan to change the current Image of Islam as a violent terrorism religion to the old image of Islam of it being just a sexist misogynistic one. There used to be a time, not long ago, when people would react to my revelation to them that I am a muslim with "Islam? Isn't that the religion where a man can have 4 wives?" instead of the current "Islam, isn't that the religion where people just blow shit up?" response, and I believe we can bring those days back again. We just have to market it right, and I figured the best way to do it is to flaunt the islamic perk of having more than one wife at a time by putting a 21st century spin on it. Something along the lines of "Islam, the religion of threesomes, Foursomes and Moresomes", you know? Cause what's the point of having two wives if you can't have threesomes, right? But, unfortunately, according to this Fatwa, the muslim women can not be naked in front of non-msulim women or women with lesbian tendencies, so that plan is all shot to shit. Can you imagine if that wasn't the case? Men all over the world would be converting like that!

And as far the implication to us as a good ole isalmic society, one has to realize that this means that the majority of women are sinning without even knowing, and some of them who do know can't even help it. Just think about it: Female Bathrooms and Locker-rooms. It's used by both Muslim and christian women, which means that there are many muslim girls who were described by their evil christian counterparts to strange men, because, u know, they have nothing better to do with their time. This also means that in a true Islamic society, there would have to be separate changing rooms and bathrooms for Muslim and Non-Muslim females in every sporting club, Gym, restaurant and public Place. Just imagine: A nice lil sign next to the bathroom that says "Muslims only" next to it, or "No non-muslims allowed". Yes. That's the way to do it, and until we do this we are just freakin western-wannabe heathens who don't care about the honor and modesty of our women.

On another note, can you imagine what Human rights organizations, or CAIR, would do if in a western country there was a bathroom- we are not even talking cafe here, a bathroom- with a "No Muslims allowed" or "Non-Muslims only" sign next to it?

Hmm… 

Comments

  1. Wow, you are truly brilliant when it comes to black humour. This was fun, but yet very interesting.

    The logic consequense of the ban you portray is very consistent and valid.

  2. I am pretty sure coptic girls wouldn’t want to get into this place anyways…It’s like straights fighting for their right to get into a gays only bar…What a waste of time.

  3. Bob, I like to look at it as a black guy trying to go into a whites only bar in the 50s and 60s. This is discrimination based on religion.

  4. Don’t be silly. The sign wouldnt read anything. There would be three doors: a little male stick figure; a little female stick figure with a cross and a little female stick figure with a crescent.

  5. Worst case is where Muslim women are denied modern medical care in childbirth based on “modesty” claims. Best male profession in Afghanistan: Gravedigger.

  6. Cairene: In many places the Muslim solution is far simpler: No need to worry about signs on public bathroom doors where all women are prohibited. Sister, you need to do what?! Headline: Local Minder Reports Stench In Vegetable Market, Claims Wicked Women Are The Source

    Where Muslim farce persists, darkness rules the day.

  7. … my plan to change the current Image of Islam as a violent terrorism religion to the old image of Islam of it being just a sexist misogynistic one:
    “Islam? Isn’t that the religion where a man can have 4 wives?” instead of the current “Islam, isn’t that the religion where people just blow shit up?” response, and I believe we can bring those days back again.

    Haha! Brilliant! I love you, you’re really awesome!
    Don’t give up, we can bring back those good ol’ times! :) )

    I recently read a longish post including this joke:

    A young muslim and an old muslim walk through Berlin Neukölln. A bird flies past them and drops something – and strikes. The old muslim explains to the young one: “This damn islamophobia! For the others they sing!”

    (This joke sounds jewish to you? You’re absolutely right.)

    Thank you,
    ;-)
    Maria

  8. Isn’t that better to dump these religions for the good of man?

  9. SM,

    Why would a christian even consider going to a place like this. Seriously with all the salons in cairo that have hairdressers that are recognized all over the world why would a Christian woman go to a veiled woman place.

    I would like to give them a call though and give them a piece of my mind this a an overseas call that is very much worth it.

    If this is Hanan Turk for real she must have gone mad :)

  10. hahaha man this post made my day!

  11. Seriously though, what can be done to stop this? If nothing is done, we’ll get more and more of these places and signs such as ‘no christians allowed’ would be a norm.

  12. Herlock Sholmes says:

    Dear Sandmonkey,

    You seem to forget that a mere 40 years ago there was a sign in every public bathroom in the United States saying either “Whites Only” or “No Blacks allowed”. Discriminating based on Religion is no different than discriminating based on skin color. And, if this proves that Egypt is only 40 years behind the US, then it is progress. Maybe, with time, we will get our own Mohamed Luther Malek and he will, too, have a dream. A dream of seeing women’s hair, a Dream that all women across the land will be born equally miserable, and so many other things.

    In France, it is a crime to deny the Holocaust ever happened. In Egypt, it will soon be a crime to be non Muslim. Is it any different? If France is already there, why would Egypt not follow? Maybe we will get our own Sheikh Tooba who will deny that the holocaust happened, that non Muslims are pigs and he will become a martyr for it. Who knows?

    Egypt is well. Egyptians build the pyramids and the sphinx. They left the trees and build cities when the rest of the world was still chasing bananas on trees. Because of that, we are the mother of the world. Besides, we have the Nile. Can you deny that? So, in short, all is well. Don’t worry, god willing. Everything that God brings is good. Be it wealth, pollution, blonde Swedish tourists or Gamal, it is all the will of God. After all, we are the land that God loves. Didn’t he send us a great president to lead us?

    Besides, modern Egyptians have achieved great things. Last year alone, 12,879 new kilometers of roads were built; 2,390 tons of sugar produced, 2,983,011 babies hatched and, as recommended by our fearless leader most Egyptian now only put one spoon of sugar in their Tea. Tough times require tough measures…

    Also, as reported in the press, this year Ramadan was a resounding success. Official Statistics report that 97.83% of Egyptians fasted every one of the 30 days of Ramadan. The Government knows because it is the same statistic as the number of people who voted for our fearless leader. They used the same list when coming up with the numbers. You see, this is a sign of progress in Egypt; we no longer re-invent the wheel every time. We had a perfectly good list of voters; why not use it to come up with fasters? While we are at it, the list is also currently being used for showing that Muslim brotherhood membership is in decline in Egypt, for the membership to the Ahly football club and for determining the sex of babies.

    So, Sandmonkey, I really don’t understand why you are outraged when a café bans Christians from entering. It is a well-known fact that Christians still put two spoons of sugar in their Tea. They are not as patriotic as the rest of Egyptians. If every café banned them, the Egyptian economy would be in much better shape. Also, Sandmonkey, as a Muslim yourself you should be happy that your wife, girlfriend or your fornicating partner of the day has a place to go where she can show her breasts around and remove the tan line on them. Of course, before sending your woman there, you must make sure that, at the door, instead of only checking religion they also check sexual orientations. Apparently your woman cannot get a breasts tan in the presence of a lesbian.

    In conclusion, please stop harassing the café with your ridiculous phone calls. Egypt is the most ancient of civilizations and as it is a proven fact that history is cyclical, we will be great once again.

    Unless of course, Saad Zaghloul was right, mafish fayda

    Herlock Sholmes

  13. يمكن ان ادخل هنا؟ بطاقتي تقول انني مسلم

    When it comes to racism and segregation, I prefer conspicuously posted signs like this barring non-muslims from cafes or visiting mecca, rather than the unspoken but understood discrimination that is quite normally justified in most cultures as legitimate (ex. the ban on intermarriage which is enforced privately from within the family but which is nonetheless flagrant racism). Identity is a very complicated and difficult issue every person faces. People have promised these girls peace of mind if they identify themselves as muslims in all aspects of life, but of course we have learned that dividing humanity does not hold truth and is a painful earthly distraction from God’s love.

    .الله اكبر من اي اهل او اي دين

  14. SM,
    Brilliant. It makes me so happy to hear a proud Muslim speak reason in the darkness. And you’re entertaining too! The problem is there are so many fools/so much darkness. You need to start reproducing and creating more little sandmonkeys as soon as possible. Get on that right away!

  15. Herlock, your comparison to France and the holocaust denial laws and the “white only signs in the US (you’re absolutely wrong on that one) show what a lopsided bigoted mindset you have. There is no excuse to promote hatred the way you express it.

    “I really don’t understand why you are outraged when a café bans Christians from entering”

    “If every café banned them, the Egyptian economy would be in much better shape”

    And then your babbling about breasts and tan lines! You need therapy my friend. How many of the 2,983,011 babies have you hatched, bird brain?

  16. Call in and check out our interview tonight at 8PM EST with Dr. Paul L. Williams, author of The Day of Islam at thirdrailradio.com

  17. Roman Kalik says:

    Um, Tedders? Sarcasm and irony aren’t your strong suit, are they? Herlock was making absurd comparisons *on purpose*.

  18. “Egypt is well. Egyptians build the pyramids and the sphinx.”

    Amazing! :D :D:D

  19. Wait a second, wasn’t Herlock’s post a joke?? Tedders, I think you took it the wrong way cuz I was laughing my ass off as I read it….VERY funny!!

    Good stuff….about a sad topic.

  20. “Black humo(u)r”?

    What, are you some kind of racist?

    Constable, arrest that man!

  21. loooool.. once in the friday prayer in Beirut, the sheikh was telling men not to send their daughters to women only beaches because they will be filmed there and their pix spread..lool.. wish u were there! haha

  22. Herlock you should get your blog up and running again. I definitely miss your wit and sarcasm.

  23. “Tedders? Sarcasm and irony aren’t your strong suit, are they? Herlock was making absurd comparisons *on purpose*.”

    I feel soo inadequate! I’ll go recalibrate my sarcasm radar!! You go Herlock, I’ll try to read between the lines next time!!! Thanks for being kind Roman!

  24. Tedders,

    You need a catalog while reading blogs and history as well :)

  25. “You need a catalog while reading blogs and history as well ”

    Hehehe, more sarcasm, right Two’s? You made me snort! Stop that!! : )

    Hope all is going well for you and your family, we just got back from a Paris/Prague trip, it was amazing. The only anti American scenes we saw were a hizzbillah demonstration (about fifteen freezing anarchists) in Paris’ Latin Quarter. Poor unemployed tykes with nothing better to do than stomp around trying to keep their toes warm. Everyone else was very happy to see us spending our devalued dollar there. Happy holidays Two!!!

  26. John Cunningham says:

    Merry Christmas, twosret

  27. “the reason why they don’t allow Christians in, is because Islam views non-Christian women the same as strange men.”

    SM, when you report on things like how much skin should Muslim women show in front of other women (whether Muslim or Christian) please do not generalize. Not all veiled Muslim women believe in what you have just quoted. For the times to come please say things like “Some Muslims believe…” or “According to the so and so mazhab…”.

  28. John and tedders,

    Thank you guys happy holidays to you too and I mean it :) I’m so mad about the dollar. I was in CA and looked at houses there hoping the market will soften more and I see some foreclosures to knock down and build a vacation home and I was surprised at how much lower houses are in CA.

    Paris and Prague hmmm you are such a spoilt brat I’m working my butt off 10 hours a day 6 days a week since Nov. and your prostituting in Europe (excuse my french). Hope your vacation went well and you enjoyed it I hope you post us some pictures.

    I’m giving shit to some zionist friends of yours on another blog the same ole shit you know and thought of you guys loool.

    I have to say though I met this awesome Jewish lady in my daughter school and her daughters love my daughter so much and comfort her when she cries and it made me almost tearful to think how children are so innocent and loving anyway this lady I helped with something and she keeps sending business my way. What do you guys give as gifts for Hanukkah? I want to give her kids something. Let me know if you can think of anything useful for this occasion.

  29. “(This joke sounds jewish to you? You’re absolutely right.)”

    Actually, it is.

  30. “why would a Christian woman go to a veiled woman place”

    why would a veiled woman go to that place?

  31. Herlock Sholmes @ 12,

    Can I assume your post was in jest or your power of deduction got scrambled along with your name?

    Which is it?

  32. “What do you guys give as gifts for Hanukkah?”

    I could say “Hanukkah gelt (money)” but I could be wrong.

    As an alternative you can do what I did once (all kids were young, under 10 or something like that).

    I got change of $10.00 in pennies. I divided all between kids and we played dreidel.

    Google: “(Dreydl) Four-sided, top-like toy with the Hebrew letters nun, gimel, hay, and shin on the sides used to play a traditional Chanukah game.”

    Do not ask for more details. They’ll teach you. Result will be fun for everyone including adults.

  33. Herlock Sholmes @ 12,

    I think I owe you an apology for suspicion. Those who know you believe your post was meant as a joke. Again, my apologies.

  34. John Cunningham says:

    Twosret, kids are kids, probably just an ordinary toy, age appropriate, and they’ll love it. The only thing to worry about is if it’s made in China.

  35. “The only thing to worry about is if it’s made in China.”

    Ha! You’re right John. No Chinese toys Twos! We don’t want any scenarios that could negatively effect Annapolis do we!! LOL

    “I’m so mad about the dollar. I was in CA and looked at houses there hoping the market will soften more and I see some foreclosures to knock down and build a vacation home and I was surprised at how much lower houses are in CA.”

    What market are you in? Isn’t it the NE? Here in north Texas we don’t get the big swings in housing when there is a crunch or a boom like both coasts do. I would imagine that there are some bargains in CA relative to that market but from my perspective (land is much cheaper here!) it still looks like CrAzY housing prices to me!!

    “to think how children are so innocent and loving”

    We (adults) could all learn volumes from our children. They aren’t polluted by the sins of their prior generations (yet)! I aspire to be more like them!

    Thanks for the holiday greetings, I’ve got a ton of pictures from Paris/Prague, where do you want me to send them?

  36. Leo,

    Thanks for the suggestion I will look it up. The mom speaks to her daughters in Hebrew all the time so I’m assuming the kids will like it but I never visited their home so they have to play on their own :)

    Tedders and John,

    Yeah right the famous chinese toys, do you know I rarely buy my kids toys thank God! I buy them mainly books and some games. Between the food we eat here and the toys we should be dead in the next 2 years :)

    I thought you had a blog tedders right? well obviously not anymore, mine has been dead for a while too. You can e-mail me if you want your pictures at my e-mail address.

    It sounds like we are neighbors :) Oh can you imagine if we live in the same city LOL! that will be fun hehehee

    twosret@yahoo.com

  37. “It sounds like we are neighbors”!!

    That would be a coinkidink!! LOL
    I’m in Tarrant county, I’ll bet you must be in Dallas county.
    We’ll have to do coffee some day.

    “I thought you had a blog tedders right?”

    Nope, never a blog of my own, too many interesting blogs out there to visit!

    What part of CA were you looking for property in?
    Southern or Northern?

  38. Tedders,

    I’m not in Dallas, I’m in a secret place for security reasons heheheee too many blogroaches around.

    I was looking in Southern California New Port Beach small community Villa Lido. The weather is awesome.

    Coffee sounds good to me :)

  39. Did anyone hear anything from Brooklyn John ?

  40. B John asked me to join a business network a while back, I did. Haven’t heard much from him lately. Probably busy at work and with kids and the wife. I grew up in S Cal as a kid Twos, was just wondering about where you were looking. Probably ten or twelve years ago my Aunt and Uncle sold their 1,100 sf house in Irvine CA for near 1/2 a million, they built a 4,700 sf McMansion in Austin, even today the are amazed at the difference in cost of housing in the two states. California is a rat race but your right, the weather is nice, check out northern Cal, it’s like a completely different state!

  41. Jesus loves u all