Sandmonkey Wisdom: 27/11/2007

Girls who tell you repeatedly that they can handle their liqueur and can drink you under the table are usually big fat Liars. So unless you wanna spend your evening cleaning puke, keep the Whiskey and Absinthe away from them, and keep them drinking fruity ass shit like Malibu or something. The girls who really can handle their Liqueur don't brag about it, they just keep their mouths shut until they DO drink you under the table. They are like the worst of farts: Silent, but deadly!

Are they serious???

Saudi lies

When it comes to the girl who got sentenced for 6 month with 90 lashes after getting raped by 7 guys because she was in a car with another man, the saudi's offered this explanation:

"Then they were spotted by the other defendants as the woman was in
an indecent condition as she had tossed away her clothes, then the
assault occurred on her and the man," the statement added.

It said the sentence of prison and lashes, handed down last week
following an appeal, was legal and followed the "the book of God and
the teachings of the Prophet Muhammad," noting that she had "confessed
to doing what God has forbidden."

The woman and her husband were "convinced of the verdict and agreed to it," it said.

The husband, on the other hand, tells a different story. He says that his wife never confessed to doing anything wrong with that guy. That the only thing she confessed to was being with a strange man in closed quarters, and that the Saudi judges are trying to cover their asses by lying. He and the lawyer of the girl are saying that they intend to sue the judge and the judicial system until the girl's name is cleared. He said all of this on LIVE TV.

Does that sound like a man convinced to you? 

Two views on Beirut

Between Fisk's sensationalism and Naja's eloquence!

No christians please

*Scroll down for UPDATES* 

Forsooth received an e-mail that is the Hijaby girl's equivalent to paradise: Sabaya. Owned by the female equivelant of Ahmed El Fishawy, Hanan Turk, it's a half hairsalon/half restaurant that is  just for girls, where no men are allowed to enter and no music will be played. Their promotional e-mail lists a number of perks to those who want to frequent the place:

 Advantges of SABAYA café
- You have the freedom of taking your veil/neqab off.
2- Meeting muslim girls who are willing to get closer to Allah.
3- Increasing your 'so7ba sale7a circle'.
4-Getting the opportuinity of being inspired by real stories by the same girls you meet.
5-You can have parties.
6-Learn how to shun sin…since You won't be exposed to songs or movies JUST CARTOONS AND RELIGIOUS SHOWS.
7- Get to meet Hanan Turk. heheheheheheheheheheheh
8-Enjoy the feeling that you'r making everything which is not allowed outdoors and Allah won't be mad at you :D ..

Attending sabaya will be very useful from both the life and religious
prespective, since YOu will be helping in changing the wrong
perceptions about both Neqabis/ Hegabis that were already inheritied
ages ago.

Sounds great, right? Well, just one more thing:

- First please Don't invite Christian girls , because they aren't allowed
to the place.. Second inform all your friends that if the number of
visitors increased remarkably in the coming year..inshAllah next year
they may be able to open a branch in mohandesen or down town ..We ARE

Yep. You read that correctly. They are barring christian girls. No Christian girls allowed in Sabaya. This has to be the first open for public place that bans people on the basis of faith, and it's seriously fucked up. I can't believe that this is happening in Egypt. I can't believe that people have gotten so fucked in the head that we now segregate based on religious beliefs. Unbelieveable.

I am just wondering how they will enforce their no Christian girls allowed policy. What are they gonna do? Put a "No Christians allowed" sign on the door? Card people on the door and check out their religious identity on their ID's? What if a Christian girl sneaks in? Are they gonna grab her and throw her out? Is this even legal?

 Well, here is their number and address:

Address: 6 Meet 3'amr street . . Midan Safir . . Masr El Gedida. if
u know the street that has Cook Door / McDonald's / Oriflame /Smiley's
) . . it's behind McDonald's . . when u see McD . . go right. . then
left . . Sabaya will be on ur left . . isA

Tel: 2240 2223 – 2240 2229

 So, if you are an egyptian with any sense of decency, you should call them and give them a piece of your mind. And if you are a member of the MB- and god knows they have been coming more often to this blog- well, this is the kind of place that is the inevtiable conclusion of your group's policies and ideology. This is what you are advocating. This is the Egypt that you want. Another version of Saudi. Well, assholes, it's not gonna happen. Take a good look, because this is the closest that you will ever gonna get to it.

This is the 21st century assholes, not the 10th, try to catch up!

Update: I was so incensed that I got this christian co-worker of mine- let's call her S- call them to see if they are for real. The first number didn't work, the second one did. Here is the transcript of the conversation:

S: Salamo 3alikom, Sabaya?

Sabaya worker : we 3alikom el salam, yes?

S: I read your email, and I was just wondering, I have a Christian friend, and she’s interested in Islam, is there any way I can bring her with me?

Sabaya worker: We only permit entry to Muhajabat

S: Even in your café?

Sabaya worker: Well no in the café you can come in, but she can’t.

S: I was just hoping I can bring her with me, maybe she’ll come to her senses and god will bless her

Sabaya worker: Well we just don’t want to cause any discomfort to anyone, but god blesses us all.

S: Oh too bad, it would have been a great thawab

Sabaya worker: Ok I’ll ask Madam Hanan and can you call me back in an hour?

This is a true conversation.. and it would be funny if it wasn't so messed up!

Update: This other female friend of mine called them and asked them if it's true that Sabaya is for Hejabis and Niqabis only, and they confirmed it. When she asked them if that means no christian girls are allowed, the lady said Yes, no christians, and no girl who doesn;t have her hair coverd in general. My Friend told them that she intends to sue them, and they said to "bring it". She fully intends to.

My sentiments exactly

h/t MichelleMalkin 

The Streets of Cairo

If you want to know what it's like to be on them, check this out!

Sandmonkey wisdom of the day: 26/11/07

The difference between Americans  and Egyptians is that Americans think they have the right to do anything, until someone tells them they can't, while Egyptians think that they don't have the right to do anything, until someone tells them they could.


Now here is a story that will give Men nightmares for years!

Best US election campaign ad ever

Chuck Norris approved!

A Hamas Media Fun Park and Israeli genius

From the same people who brought you the Hamas Boyband, we present you with the Hamas Media City and amusement park. for reals:

If you believe the building plans, "Media City" will be a Disneyland
fused with Hollywood and the CNN Centre on the shores of the

There's only one catch: it's in the Gaza Strip.


And the Hamas Islamists backing the site — envisioned as a
combined amusement park, movie studio and hub for international
journalism all in one — say foreign filmmakers will be welcome, as
long as their works don't show people kissing.

But those
setbacks and the reality of Hamas rule and Israeli sanctions have not
discouraged Gaza Media City's backers, inspired by Arab examples in
Dubai and Egypt that have drawn foreign investment and created jobs.

They have started work on landscaping in the hope that one day the
project will feature a zoo and film lots that recreate among other
things, the Palestinian villages of a century ago and today's Israeli


Hamas politician Fathi Hammad said it could cost $20 million — a
bargain compared to the sort of projects seen in Gulf states away from
the Middle East conflict.

But it must be tackled in stages, with funding from Arab countries and non-governmental organizations abroad, he said.

Ok, nevermind that our people are starving, what we really need isn't food, it's a media city. And an amusement park. Yeah! Cause that makes sense. Hamas, our model for responsible leadership. A people's movement per excellence.

In other news, since winter is coming and all, Israel decided in good neighborly fashion to start cutting down its electricity supply to Gaza starting from December 2nd. And since there is no fuel either, Gazans will either have to freeze to death (nevermind the hospitals without electricty problem for now) or engage in that most Palestinian of traditions to keep warm: fucking like bunnies. And you know where babies come from, Israel, so, now, do you really want a Gazan Baby Boom? More Palestinians there? No? Well, if you don't want that, and quite possibly don't want palestinians freezing to death on your conscience, then maybe you should chill on the whole cutting the electricty business. Besides, Hamas is shooting itself in the foot right now, why interfere? Let it take its course.

You know, I keep hearing of the intellectual supremacy of the jewish people, and then I look at their politicians and the decisions they make, get the point!

Youtube suspends Wael Abbas’ account

Youtube has suspended the account of Wael Abbas – which contained the the egyptian police brutality and torture videos- because there were apparently too many complaints and flags from users- who are not members of the egyptian government or state security, of course- who have deemed the videos inappropriate and offensive. Youtube immediately took action, and suspended the account, claiming that it violated its terms of use. Now, while this may be true in the technical sense, it may benefit them to make exceptions for such videos that do expose certain tyrannical regimes and won;t be shown by mainstream international media, you know, as part of that whole "alternative independent media" thing they have been talking about for some time now. Or they could take on Issander's compromise. Also read Brian Whitaker's take on it!

On the Jihad revisions

Al Masry Al Youm newspaper has been running for about a week now a number of documents titled the Jihad revisions, where Ayman Al Zawahiri's old buddy, and the architect of modern Jihady perspective, Dr. Sayed Imam aka Dr. Fadl, decides to correct the misconceptions of Today's youth, and instead publishes his latest Brainfart on the proper way to conduct Jihad in the world.

Now, depsite the fantastic headlines of the revisions so far, such as "Muslims killing muslims is very very bad" and "One shouldn't attack tourists for what their governments have done", I do have some reservations. Not exactly reservations, ehh, more like questions really, and only in two areas: 

1) Howcome when Al Masry Al Youm published those documents, they didnt attempt to debate or analyze them at all? And why are they only taking the opinions of people who were or are members of islamic Jihad movements on them? Why not regular folks? Maybe throw some liberals in there? Maybe a socialist might have a different perspective on things, besides the "this is a very good thing" spin that the Al Masry Al youm seems to be, ehh, spinning? You know?

and more importantly, 

2) Why, in the name of Zeus' butthole, is something called the "the correct guide to Jihad" being published in a mainstream egyptian daily in the first place? Is Jihad Ok now? Oh, there is a correct way to do it? A righteous way to kill for Islam? Is that the message we are sending to the public now?

What the fuck is wrong with those people? 

A wikipedia of Dicks

Not of the Penis Variety, but rather of their human counterparts. Their Poster boy: Ahmedinejad!

Just like Iraq

At first it reads like the usual "Now the whole world hates us because of the War" american leftist diatribe, but upon close inspection this article does make some serious points. Definitely worth a read!

American History 300


God I love Robot Chicken! 

Does the Israeli media want war with Egypt?

I thought this was an anamoly, but it seems that it is part of a much wider campaign. Which begs the question: Does Israel really want to start a war with Egypt, or are they just using us as a diversion and a place for Israelis to focus their anger on? Cause I would hate to think that the Israeli military machine is so adamant to fix its broken ego from going to a war that they couldn't win last year against a militia with no military targets, that they are just looking for a country that does have viable targets to bomb. Like Syria. But the Syrians are Giant pussies and refused to act when attacked. So, is it Egypt's turn now?  Would it be wise to inflame a country with over 80 million people and 10 million in the armed forces alone?

I would like to know.

Also, the egyptian press hasn't caught wind of this yet. I wonder how their reaction will be once they hear about it. 

Putin’s democracy

His political opponents are beaten up, arrested, and some even assassinated . Now there is a world leader that people the world over respect, unlike Bush the  muslim-babies-killing talking monkey!

Oh, and guys, there is a "thing" called Chechnya where, you know, muslims are getting killed? Makes you pissed at Russia, right? No? Wait, I forgot, they have to be muslims killed by the US or Israel to matter, right? Russia is our friend, or at least Hamas, Hezbollah and Iran's friend. Delightful people, all of them! 

Egyptian Doctor to cure homosexuality

Dr. Awsam Wasfi is an egyptian doctor who just opened a clinic to cure homosexuality. How does he plan to do that? well…

Dr. Awsam Wasfi, 42, offers a "treatment program" for gays that focuses
on boosting their self-esteem and enhancing their communication skills,
as well as encouraging them to play sports and work on their religious

Ok, cause I am sure working out, working out, and sweating with other men is going to make you not attracted to them. Neither will changing in the same locker room or showering in the same shower room with them. Oh, and praying in the mosque will surely cure you, with men bending over during prayers and all. Yes, religion and sports, two things no gay person knows anything about.

This is so stupid!

One interesting thing in the article though:

Gay rights organizations in Egypt have lashed out at the psychiatrist
for "standing in the way of their human rights" and labeled him
"backward" and "ignorant."

There are Gay rights organizations in Egypt? Really? I mean there is the egyptian Initiative for personal rights, but that hardly qualifies as a gay rights organization. But I've never heard of one. Am I missing something?

And the Golden Whip goes to…

Behold the First Cairo Police Torture Film Festival.